Okay, this comes from real life, like I promised.
About two months ago, a guy contacted me from MySpace.com. Didn’t say much, didn’t even ask to be added as a friend. He never sent any comments, or made any blog posts. Just sent me a message saying he thought I was pretty. I actually ignored the first couple of messages he sent me, feeling the intuition going to the “S” (suspicious zone). Finally, I answered, not because he had enticed me or wore me down, just because I didn’t want to be rude. It was sorta’ like someone who keeps talking to you, and you finally turn around and yell, “WHAT DO YOU WANT?”
He kept asking and asking for my number. He finally gave me his numbers, home and cellular. Was bored one evening and went against the ole’ intuition, gave this guy my cellular number. Jeez, do I ever read my own articles? Upon first talking with him on the phone, I was really turned off. He talked so damn fast, I couldn’t understand most of what he said. After the first conversation, I never wanted to talk with him again.
He continued to write me over and over again. I didn’t respond.
He contacted me one day stating he was coming to ‘Vegas. Oh, I so wasn’t excited about this, but figured I didn’t have to meet him anyway. Then he told me the woman who paid for his ticket here had gotten back with her boyfriend and she wouldn’t be meeting him. She did tell him to use the tickets anyway, as he said he had an older child here, so he could use the tickets to see his kid. That was a real nice gesture, a bit expensive, but nice. So, he was here and was supposed to see a couple of other women he had been chatting with and his kid.
Long story short: I met with him and had lunch and we walked the Strip. He wanted to get some Rum at a more reasonable price than on the Strip, so I stopped at a local liquor store. While there, he purchased a bottle of Vodka for me, $18.99. I drove the whole day so I was in control of where we went and how long I was with him. After the Strip, I took him back to his hotel, said “thank you,” and felt it was clear we would not see each other again. “It” just wasn’t there between us. There were little signs, like no PDA for one thing, and the fact he was constantly looking at others, not just chicks, but everybody, like he was looking for approval. Could be wrong on that one, but it just appeared he was looking for approval, and people to notice him the whole time we were out. It would also explain the non-PDA, as he would have to show someone else attention.
We spoke the next morning, by phone, and he told me he had a date with a woman at 7:00 p.m. He asked what I was doing, and since I assumed we were not a couple or even going to date again, he didn’t need to know what I was planning. Just as I was leaving for my date, he called. He asked where I was going, and I informed him I was going out. He then got a bit upset and said I had told him I wasn’t doing anything. I asked him what difference it made if I was going out or not as he was supposed to have a date as well. He said the date got cancelled. So, basically, I was supposed to sit at home just in case he didn’t have a date or something. He told me he wouldn’t contact me again.
Next day he called again, and again, and again. He left messages, a ton of them. Some of the messages said how he knew I wanted him and how I should come over, others where he was real pissed. I didn’t answer the phone. He was supposed to leave ‘Vegas. He said everybody dis’d him, and he was pissed. He even wrote a rather mean bulletin on MySpace reflecting his anger. I figured he would be catching a plane shortly and so I didn’t need to worry.
As life would have it, somehow he missed his plane. Then he called unremittingly saying he had missed his plane, did I still want to see him. At one point, I was on a call with a friend for an hour, and this guy called 6 times during that one call. I had started to get a bit concerned as to the intentions of this guy and looked him up on a few Internet sites. He wasn’t a registered sexual offender. Whew! I wasn’t able get on to the county court website for his county, so I looked in the local newspaper. I found the police blotter which spoke of his DUI #3 charge and arrest. Then, much to my surprise and dismay, I read where there was a suspicious murder of a woman the same age as me, with the same last name as his in this very small town. What were the chances of all three of these factors coming together at the same time? This murder happened about the same time he went AWAL from MySpace for a short time. So, I was a bit more concerned at this point. There was no way in hell I was going to contact him again. I immediately went to MySpace.com and deleted him, and blocked him.
He has continued to call, even though I don’t answer, since yesterday. One of his messages today even referred to the bottle of Vodka. This is why I really hesitate when guys buy me things: seems like I need to keep paying for them over and over again. The bottle of Vodka was a whole $18.99, yet somehow I owed him for this, and should go and get him from the airport, take him to my house, and, from what he was saying, have sex with him as well, because I so wanted him. I keep hoping his cell phone battery will die, but then I think he probably has a travel charger, what a drag. I had my Mom look up flights going in his direction, and since the town is so small, there was only one leaving ‘Vegas today. He hasn’t called in the last hour, and this is about the time the flight was to leave. Hopefully he was on it.
In one of his calls he threatened me stating he was going to get home and delete me from MySpace.com and from his phone. I sure hope he keeps his word on this!
I do hope anyone who reads this understands why I stress, as well as many other dating advisors, to listen to your intuition, gut feeling, and pay attention to the Red Flags. I hate to consider what could have happened if I had went to his room, or retrieved him from the airport.
